Leaving it Behind

Nothing new is going on really, I'm just bored and feel like I might be able to get some stuff out here. Lately it's just been research and homework for me. Which really is fine considering how little work I've done this whole term. I don't mind sucking it up for the last couple weeks and putting in some hard core work on some papers. It's about time I had to do work. The only other thing of consequence happening is that I'm opening for my friend's band this Saturday which is quite exciting. I'm only going to get to play 3-4 songs but I'm still really stoked to perform and to see my friend's band as well. It's going to be a good night.

Lately I can't sleep. Well, I fall asleep eventually but it takes forever. Really I haven't been sleeping all that well for about a month, but this past week has been especially ridiculous. I had a couple bad nights when it was so bloody hot, and I haven't recovered since. I lay down, and no matter how tired I am I can't get comfortable, and my mind starts to swirl with all these thoughts and half of them don't even make sense. I think about uni and the papers I have to write, or about the gig on Saturday. I've thought about home tons. But I don't really miss it. I just think about it. Like target in my home town. Why in the world is a picture of target popping into my head? Or my grandma's front yard? Or my bedroom? Or my drive to work? I can't get these things out of my head, they're just relentless as soon as I lay down to go to sleep. And I've even tried putting on music to distract me, which normally works. But I caught myself last night thinking THROUGH the music and completely ignoring it. It was Sara Groves even. How one can ignore her music I'm not sure, but I was able to do it last night. I just want some rest. And I want to sleep through the night. I've woken up every morning sometime between six and seven every morning for the past month I think. And this comes after not being able to fall asleep until about 1am. Why am I waking up? Why can't I shut my mind off? Why does everything I think make absolutely no sense? I need rest Jesus.